Brat
by RedSand
Summary: Horny blondes really shouldn't become maids for rich, semi-goth redheads. Especially when said redheads already have masochistic clingy boyfriends. Sasodei, Sasohida, Kakuhida later, AU.
1. Chapter 1

"Guh, this is stupid un…" Deidara mumbled after a long sigh. Why did he have to be chronically unemployed? Why did he have to find incredibly stupid jobs? Oh well, they usually paid well. This job-of-the-week was… oh, great, he got to go to some mansion and be a maid. Fuckin' perfect. Some rich kid and his grandma got to boss him around while he cleaned a fuckin' huge house. Great.  
He continued walking, staring at the sidewalk as he strolled past mansion after mansion, eventual reaching the one with "Akasuna" written in the gate. He walked up to the intercom and pressed the button, a voice grunting a quick yes.

"I'm Deidara un, I'm here for the…maid…job…" He said, muttering the last two words. He already looked enough like a woman, the fact whatever pervert lived in there was probably gonna make him dress-up the part just pissed him off.

"Oh yeah, fresh meat. Heh heh, have fun kid, and try to stick around for a while." The voice replied, followed by a hearty chuckle. Deidara sighed before walking past the gate and up to the large house. There was a ton of shrubs cut to look like puppets, and a few guys in tuxes walking around. Just as the blond approached the large door an old lady flew out and ran into him, knocking them both to the ground.

"Hey, watch where you're going, you could've killed me!" She fumed, Deidara quickly standing up and helping his new boss from the ground.

"I'm...really sorry un…are you alright?" He asked, realizing he probably just fucked up his chances. Bad.

"Oh, you're the new maid aren't you?" She asked, dusting herself off and smiling up at him. "You're a tall one aren't you! Well, I need to go out for a while, just do whatever Sasori says to, alright?"

"Uh, un, sure!" Deidara happily replied, thinking this was gonna be a good job for once. The old lady walked into a limo that was waiting for her, Deidara watching before turning around and walking inside. He kicked off his shoes and looked around, trying to find his boss. He looked around the nearest couple of rooms, looking for whoever it could be who'd be giving him orders for a while.

"Sasori-no-danna un!" He shouted after his search had failed. Suddenly he could here someone coming down the stairs

"Who the hell just shouted my name? Großemutter, I've told you a hundred times…" A redhead said while strolling down the staircase. He looked over to see his new maid, and realized why he was yelling. "Oh, sorry. So you're my new maid? What's your name?"

Deidara couldn't answer. He could only stare at the insanely hot redhead. Oh, I'm sorry, did I forget to mention?  
Sasori's buck friggin' naked.  
Deidara stared at him, wide eyed and mouth hanging open, trying to break out of the naughty thoughts his mind filled with and remember his name.

"Oh…I'm…Deidara…Sasori-no-danna un…" He muttered, Sasori cocking and eyebrow and walking down. He walked up to the blond and realized he was about the same height, if not a little taller.

"So how old are you?" He asked, shortly after Deidara chocking out a weak "17 un…" Sasori whistled and checked the blond out before looking back at his sweating face. "Damn, I'm 19, you're tall aren't ya brat?"  
Deidara was too caught up in his homoerotic desires to listen to his new nickname, merely nodding and smiling as Sasori stood in front of him.  
"Well, whenever großemutter Chiyo goes out I like to nap naked on the couch, so just clean the place up and wake me in about three hours." He said before leaving the blond. After a few moments passed he recovered and decided to go about his buisiness, cleaning the ungodly large house.

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"Hmm, he's cute, and I've always wanted to fuck a taller guy…" Sasori mumbled to himself as he laid back on the couch. "Gotta tie up some loose ends first though, but he probably won't care."

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It took some time, but Deidara had finally finished cleaning the whole house. And with an hour to spare before he had to wake up Sasori! He was walking down the hallway, maybe go back to the kitchen and get a snack or something. While going through the upstairs hallway he noticed a room he must've missed, with a picture of a red scorpion on it. He walked in, and noticed it was perfectly clean already. It almost looked like a spare bedroom, closet had everything put away neatly, bed was made, though the life-sized puppets hanging from the ceiling were an odd test. There was a little workbench with a puppet (torso and head only, there was an arm and leg sitting there as well but unconnected) resting on it, and next to the bed was a nightstand. There was a desk lamp, alarm clock, and picture on it, all of them facing the bed and the picture intriguing the blond. He walked over and picked it up, a bit happy and a bit disappointed at what he saw. It was his master, Sasori, wearing a black shirt with some guy with slicked back silver hair wearing a purple shirt hugging onto his neck. He had a Jashinist pendant dangling from his neck and in front of the redhead's face, and from the look on both of their faces (more the slight blush on the other guys, and the fact Sasori's hands were nowhere to be seen) they were a lot more than friends.  
He carefully made sure to put the picture back where it was, and decided to check out his danna's wardrobe. He walked over to Sasori's closet and opened it up, revealing what looked like what would happen if Richard Z Kruspe and Marilyn Manson moved in together. Everything was black and had that industrial metal or goth look to it. At first he was a little creeped out, but when he started imagining Sasori in some of the little outfits he had in there his mind started going to pervert mode again. He decided to stop fantasizing when he imagined the redhead as some gothic loli thing. He left the room and closed the door behind him, realizing he'd spent almost the whole hour in there. He went downstairs to the sleeping nude, glancing down real quick to make sure he was a natural red, and woke him up.

"Sasori-no-danna un, it's been about three hours un…" He whispered, though he'd much rather sit and watch the redhead sleep.

"Mmm, Dei-kun…" He moaned in his sleep, startling Deidara at first, but then only exciting him. "Dei-kun…"

"Y-Yes danna un? What is it?" He asked, moving in so their faces were only inches away.

"Dei-kun…I want you…" He moaned, Deidara moving his face slightly closer, so that he could feel Sasori's breath on him.

"Danna un…" He moaned, his fantasies coming true faster than he'd thought.

"Dei-kun…I said wake me up, not molest me in my sleep." Sasori said before getting up and facing the blond, who'd been shocked and fell over.

"D-Danna un…I…um…" He said, trying to find some way to excuse himself. Sure, he knew there was no way, but having an excuse couldn't hurt, right?

"Right, well, I'll talk to ya later, I'm thirsty." Sasori said before getting up and heading for the kitchen, leaving the lustful blond on the ground to make up an excuse.

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a/n - yep, I've finally decided to stop typing in bold. I used to because I had bad eyesight, and couldn't read what I was typing unless it was bold. But now I guess my sight's getting better, cuz I can see! I should be busy with SOTM, but this was in my head and I didn't wanna lose it, so yeah. And don't worry dA fans, I'll post this on there soon. Just come back here when the good stuff really starts happening ^^


	2. Chapter 2

Deidara sat on the couch while his master was in the kitchen, thinking of what he did wrong. Nope, couldn't think of a damned thing. Why did he have to have such a hot boss, who may or may not be into him, and basically just prove he wanted him worse than anyone he's ever wanted before? Life isn't fair.  
He got up and walked into the kitchen, noticing Sasori standing at the counter with a bottle of water.

"Hey brat." He said before taking a big gulp.

"Um…danna un…When we were in there earlier un…" Deidara choked out, needing to know whether or not his boss was pretending the whole time. "Were you…really…dreaming about me un?"

Sasori smirked and put his water down on the counter before walking up to the blond. He was wearing a towel now, meaning Deidara wasn't as much lost in perverse thought as he was intimidated.

"Would you like me to tell you, or maybe we could act it out?" The redhead offered, Deidara tensing up as his nosebleed thoughts were pushed to the front of his mind.

"Uh…What do you mean un…?" He mumbled as Sasori lightly pressed against him.

"Well, if you wanna know what I was dreaming," Sasori started before wrapping an arm around his maid's waist "We were both in the living room, next to my couch. I was naked, and you only had your underwear on, but we'll skip that. We were slowly moving our faces closer, whispering each other's names as we did…" Sasori said, both of them mimicking the action until they were centimeters away, just like before. "And then you wanna know what happened?"

"U-un danna…" Deidara muttered, finding it hard to talk in his current position.

"You…" He whispered before moving in so his mouth was next to the blonde's ear. "woke me up."

Sasori gave the blond a playful slap on the cheek before walking away, once again leaving the blond in a state of shock. He slumped down and leaned against the counter, realizing his boss did seem to have some feelings for him.

"Hey brat, get out here!" Sasori shouted, knocking the blond out of his thoughts. He quickly stood up and walked into the living room, his master standing there holding something behind his back.

"What is I t danna un?" Deidara asked, Sasori only showing him a smirk in response.

"I just realized that you're out of uniform, we have to change that."

no. no. no. No. No. NO! Of all things, why this? Why now? He already knew what his "uniform" would be, and he knew he wouldn't enjoy it.  
Sasori took from behind his back a little maid's uniform, Deidara realizing all of his worst nightmares were coming true. He sank a little, but he knew he needed this job. If he needed to cross-dress, then god dammit, he would cross-dress.  
Sasori tossed him the little outfit, and Deidara eyed it for a moment. It was your standard little French maid outfit, frilly little black skirt and blouse with puffy sleeves, black stockings and heels, and even a little choker with a pink heart pendant on it.  
The blond let out an almost inaudible groan as he started to leave, though Sasori cleared his throat to get his attention.

"Where d'you think you're going, brat?" He asked, Deidara staring back at him with confusion.

"…To change danna un…" He weakly replied, Sasori smiling, crossing his arms, and shaking his head in response.

"Here. Change here, in front of me." Sasori said before taking a seat on the couch.

"B-but danna un…" Deidara muttered, Sasori continuing to stare him down. Deidara figured he'd seen more of Sasori, and it wouldn't be too much of a problem, so he might as well.

He quickly tossed off his shirt and replaced it with the blouse, ignoring how uncomfortable it felt and went to his pants. He slowly undid them and pulled them off, a small blush forming on his face once they were gone. He could feel the redhead's gaze all over him as he pulled on the skirt.  
Oh great, now it'll get fun.  
He sat down on the floor and pulled off his socks, quickly replacing them with the silk stockings and putting the heels on over them. He stood back up (and was a bit wobbly, it was his first time in heels after all) and put on the choker, his little outfit now complete.

"Good, that wasn't so bad, right?" Sasori asked, Deidara only blushing and turning away in response. "Alright, now go and get me my water."

Deidara nodded and sighed before walking back into the kitchen. After he stumbled his way in (remember, first time in heels) he grabbed the redhead's water bottle and walked back out. He slowly walked to his boss and handed him the bottle, but the redhead didn't budge.

"Closer brat." Sasori told him, Deidara huffing in response and leaning in closer. Sasori grabbed him by the arm and pulled him onto his lap, shocking a small shriek from him. "What's the matter?"

Deidara opened his tightly shut eyes a little to look at his smirking danna, a second later the redhead's lips crashing against his own. He didn't move, he didn't tense up, he didn't even try to push him away. He didn't know if he was to shocked to stop his boss or if he was just enjoying it too much. He didn't kiss back, instead just melted into the redhead's arms wrapped around his waist. Just as he closed his eyes and started to really enjoy it, footsteps could be heard approaching. And they didn't sound happy, Deidara could tell this kind of thing.  
He broke the kiss and turned around, the man from the picture in Sasori's bedroom standing at the entrance to the room. He was wearing a fishnet shirt and a purple jacket hanging open over it, and a tight pair of leather pants.

"Hey Hidan-kun, this is my new maid, Deidara." Sasori said before pushing the blond out of his lap and signaling his boyfriend over.

"Hey." The silver haired teen said before walking over and sitting in his lap. "Are we still going out later, or did you wanna fuck him first?"

"Nah, let's go out first. Maybe he'll be interested in a threesome later." Sasori replied before the two met in a teeth crashing kiss. Deidara sat and watched as their tongues swirled around each other, little streams of drool running out of both of their mouths. After a little bit they broke the kiss and went into a little fit of panting before Hidan crawled off his lap.

"Let me go get dressed, wait down here for me." He said before standing up and heading for the stairs. "Brat, come on."

Deidara got off the couch and followed after the redhead, both of them heading up to his room. Once in Deidara shut the door behind him, and Sasori went strait for his closet.

"So…he's your boyfriend un?" Deidara asked as Sasori took out a ripped up black shirt.

"Yep. He's good company, and has that kinda ass that's always real tight, he's great in bed." Sasori answered before pulling out a leather jacket that went down to his knees. He put it on over his shirt before tossing off his towel, then kneeled down to get pants. He pulled out a pair of baggy winter-camo colored pants and slid them on before grabbing a pair of socks.

"Alright, I'm done. You wanna come with us brat?" Sasori asked as they left and went downstairs.

"Uh…why un?" He asked as they reached the bottom.

"I dunno, d'you wanna or not?" He asked, slightly irritated that his maid talked back to him.

"Um…sure un, but shouldn't I change first?" He asked, Sasori only chuckling a little in response.

"Nah, I'm sure no one'll mind, at least where we're going." The redhead replied as they walked into the living room and met with Hidan. The two shared another messy kiss before walking to the doorway and putting their shoes on. Sasori had a pair of leather boots, and Hidan had black slip-ons.

"All right brat, come on." Sasori said as Hidan clung to his arm before they walked out, Deidara wobbling closely behind.


	3. Chapter 3

Deidara sluggishly followed his boss and the silver haired stranger into a club. He felt awkward, dressed as a maid, but when they entered he found that oddly enough he wasn't the only one, in fact there were two more over by the wall. "Rammstein" by Rammstein was playing and the mood mainly seemed mellow, probably the fact the whole place was painted black and the only light was a chandelier and candles on the walls giving off a red glow. Sasori and Hidan walked over to the bar and sat down, Deidara having to stand inbetween them. The bartender walked over, poured Sasori and Hidan drinks, then walked back off.

"So how fuckin' long you think you'll last blondy?" Hidan asked, Deidara a little shook up.

'Does he hate me already un?' He thought before Sasori nudged him.

"Hidan's got the mouth of a dead sailor, he doesn't mean anything when he curses." The redhead whispered.

"Oh, I dunno un, as long as Sasori no danna will keep me I guess…" He weakly replied, Hidan looking a little confused.

"You don't wanna leave already?" He asked before downing his drink in one gulp.

"No, why would I un?" Deidara replied, Sasori nursing half his drink before standing up.

"Hey, it's time, c'mon you two." He said before walking off. Hidan lit up and followed him, Deidara a little confused, but eager to know what it was time for.

They both caught up to the redhead and followed him to the bathroom before all entering. It was as dirty as a gas station bathroom, the usual graffiti written and drawn on the walls. Sasori walked to a stall, opened it and reached inside his jacket while turning to his maid.

"Here," He started, handing Deidara a camcorder. "Are you good with one of these?" He asked, Deidara very confused.

"Um, un, I guess so…" He replied before Sasori smiled and threw off his jacket.

"Good."

The redhead grabbed Hidan, pushed him in the stall, pressed him against the wall and planted a deep kiss on him while taking the his jacket off. Once the purple jacket was thrown over the stall and into the next Sasori moved and began kissing his neck, going lower down his chest and leaving a trail of saliva down his fishnet covered chest. He undid his leather pants and pulled them down with his boxers before grabbing his already rock hard dick and stroking it.

"Hey brat, turn the damn camera on already." He said before getting on his knees and licking around the base of the teen's cock. Deidara quickly turned it on and shakily recorded, his face turning so many shades of red you'd think he was a tomato.

Sasori wrapped his lips around the side of Hidan's cock and kissed his way to the head, the foul mouthed teen arching his back and gripping one hand onto the back of Sasori's head while moaning his name. Sasori soon took his entire length into his mouth and began rapidly sucking, Hidan's load moaning filling the room and a trickle of blood pouring from Deidara's nose.  
Sasori pulled off And sat on the toilet before pulling his cock out and patting his legs for Hidan to come over. The masochist, entirely unlubed, took his place on the redhead's lap, slowly sheathing his large cock into him. Sasori let out a deep groan and grabbed under Hidan's knees to help lift him up.

'Damn un…' Deidara thought, his hand steadying as his cock grew. The lovely sight, Sasori in his ripped up shirt and winter camo pants with Hidan, wearing nothing but his boots and fishnet shirt on his lap, well what would you do?

"Ahh, fuck Sasori, stop torturing me and start fucking me!" Hidan moaned as Sasori sucked on the nape of his neck. Sasori smirked and spread Hidan's leg open before lifting him up a little, then thrusting as he lowered him back down.

"AH FUCKING JASHIN-SAMA!!!!" Hidan yelled as Sasori drove straight into his prostate. The action was repeated a few times until they had nice hard rhythm, Hidan leaning his head back and giving Sasori more to kiss suck, lick, bite, anything to force out another moan. "Fuck me harder Sasori! Fuck Me Harder!!!" Hidan screamed before reaching his arm back around Sasori's head and using his free hand to jerk himself off.

Deidara stood with the camera, catching every devilish scream and moan from Hidan and every groan from Sasori, His cock growing in his panties and showing a bulge in his skirt. He lowered his free hand into his skirt and began playing with himself, slowly stroking back and forth over his cock as the older teens fucked in front of him.

"Sasori!! I'm cumming!!" Hidan moaned as he continued stroking himself. "Shit, me too!" Sasori replied before they both let out a loud moan and came. The two met in a frenzied kiss before Hidan pulled off of his seme's cock.

"Hidan-kun, looks like my maid hasn't came yet." Sasori said before standing next to said masochist.

"Should we help him out Sasori?" Hidan asked as they approached the blond.

"I do believe so." Sasori answered before they both dropped to their knees and pulled Deidara's cock out.

"W-wait a second un…" He moaned as their hands clasped around his cock and began slowly stroking. Hidan began sucking the head as Sasori began playing with his balls and licking the shaft.

"Uh-uh brat, I won't have you arguing." Sasori said before his lips met Hidan's at the head, the tongues playing with each other and with the sensitive tip.

"Yeah, just fuckin' enjoy it blond." Hidan said before he and Sasori began sucking opposite sides. Deidara was getting close to his climax, to speed things up he slid one of his hands into his blouse and began tweaking his nipples, and bit onto his other to help silence his moaning.

"Mmm, cumming, un!!" Deidara moaned as he released, Hidan and Sasori moving away so his stream of salty goodness flew past them and struck the floor. The two goths stood up and lead Deidara out after getting redressed and cleaned up.

"So how was your first day on the job brat?" Sasori asked as they climbed into the redhead's limo.

"Um... It was… exciting kinda un…" He muttered, a blush forming on his face.

"Good, you'll be living at the mansion by the way. Hope you have fun!" Sasori told him as Hidan climbed in his lap and they began making out.

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a/n - Yes, I know it's been a long time... but at least it's here right? And it's not my fault it's late! It's hers! No, not you, behind her, now to the left a little, yes, you! You should be ashamed of yourself!


End file.
